He had been exposed to the entire mosque, and certainly he would be followed, because people actually believed in the unfortunate spectacle. His paranoia grew with each unique snowflake.He knew he had enemies by default who would want him dead. He did not know whom to trust anymore. He could not even trust his own mother who had lied to him his entire life. A torrent of yesterdays flashed in his mind, especially the yesterdays of incarceration. He dismissed such thinking a while ago, blaming mental illness. Was it all true? Still no answer save a slight wind rattling the window, and the snow falling imperceptibly as though it shared his fear and utter desolation. The snow seemed to whisper that California was a dream indeed, that loneliness, a state of being he easily grasped, would unfold in added dimensions, that responsibility towards Allah would somehow govern and direct his days from now on, this same Allah against whom he had resoundingly rebelled. At the heart of it all,. They beckoned her to a much different body of worship. A feminine entreaty to self-pleasure. Her worship had lifted Lydia from her knees and took her to the looking glass she kept covered with a shroud. This drape Lydia removed revealing to her own self the full length of her body head to toe. ‘Sin of self-love possesses all mine eye and all my soul and all my every part. And for this sin there is no remedy. It is so grounded inward in my heart. I know no face so gracious as mine. No shape so true, no truth of such account. And for myself my own worth is defined. For my beauty in all other worth’s surmounted. The glass shows me myself indeed, gloriously fair surpassing all known or seen. My own self-loving is an iniquity. It is thee, I that I praise. Painting my desire with the beauty of my days’ Lydia directed every attention, every thought and every word of the sonnet she knew by rote. As she had so many times before Lydia stared intently as she lowered her cape to expose the.
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